Years ago, I was at my grandmother’s bedside during her final days. There I joined my mother, aunt and uncles. We were joined intermittently by a hospice worker – whose name I regrettably don’t remember.
The hospice worker was full of compassion, grace, patience and kindness. It would not be a stretch to suggest that she was even saintly.
Within the last month alone, I’ve spoken to three friends who have also been in the presence of a hospice worker and their impressions are remarkably similar.
Hospice comes from the Latin word meaning “guest” or “host.” Originally hospices were a place. Religious guest houses that were often located within inhospitable conditions like the Alps, where weary travelers would find respite. Eventually they evolved into places for the sick and dying and then an entire field of palliative care.
In talking with a friend recently, we spoke of the lessons hospice workers offer to the living. Among their greatest gifts is simply their presence. Sitting quietly, keeping still, ready to offer care or comfort – not only to the patient but the family whenever needed.
My friend said it ignited an urge in her to just pull her loved ones close. The idea being that life is indeed too short to wait for their company until we are on our death bed.
It is a sad or perhaps even morbid thought exercise to imagine who will be by our bedside when our days are numbered or conversely to whose bedside we will rush to when called — without question or a moment’s hesitation.
It begs the question, why wait until our time is so limited to gather by each other’s side?
It is an unfortunate reality that we often push away those who are closest to us. Resist that urge. Pull them in. Offer grace instead and consider following the example of hospice workers – who not only show the way to “crossover” but to come together.
This Week’s Recommendation: Getting coffee earlier today, I heard this earthy rendition of “I dreamed a dream” from Les Miserables. It doesn’t have the emotional heft of the original, but this stripped down version is fresh and accessible. If you enjoy new takes on old standards check it out.
Consider sharing this with someone who could use someone by their side now.