Sandwiched in between failed attempts at two different Brandy Melville stores to procure a grad fit for my daughter, I went for a walk. The walk ostensibly was to go from one store location in the Village to another in SoHo but turned into a walk down memory lane.
I strolled through old neighborhoods where I lived and worked many years ago. Recalling nights out that began with a burger at the Corner Bistro and included stops in bars like the White Horse Tavern and Barrow’s Pub. The next day we nursed hangovers over brunch at the Bus Stop Cafe or La Bonbonniere diner. I retraced the morning walk to work – popped into the building that was not just where I called work for fifteen years but also where I met many of my dearest friends and most importantly my wife.
I paused at a park where I would go to read or reflect, thinking about old friends – a few of which are no longer with us – and others I don’t see nearly often enough. I thought of people and stories and laughs and awesome times.
Nostalgia comes from the root “nostos” meaning returning home and “algos” meaning pain. It was originally used to describe deep homesickness but has evolved to mean a broader yearning for times gone by.
Despite this yearning, science tells us – and my experience corroborates – that nostalgic experiences actually provide us with comfort. It makes us feel loved, increases our self-esteem, optimism and even life satisfaction. It can be triggered by old photos, music, stories and as in my case, place.
Without these triggers and others, we forget most of our lived experience. Other research shows that we only remember 5% of our life – unless aided by prompts.
Earlier in the week, my wife and I pulled out from storage a bin filled with old schoolwork and pictures from our oldest daughter. We lined the halls and walls of our home with poems, drawings and pictures marking her growth from kindergarten to high school graduate. It provided a literal walk down memory lane for her and our entire family. I could see and feel the warmth and joy it provided to us all.
Of course, our past isn’t all rainbows and unicorns. It includes stress, pain, loss, heartbreak, struggle and uncertainty. Yet reflecting back, reminds me that we move on, get through it, and if we’re lucky – as I have been – feel loved and supported all along the way.
If you’re looking for a little pick me up – try picking up an old photo, or your phone to call an old friend – or perhaps better yet go on a nice long walk somewhere in your past that reminds you of how far you’ve come and who has loved you along the way.
Recommendation of the Week: I recently read the book, Transcription by Ben Lerner. The short novel is a reflection on memory, experience and family. It was thought-provoking and on several occasions incredibly moving – bringing me to tear up unexpectedly.
Consider sharing this with a friend from your past.