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Recharge

As spring is peaking around the corner, many universities – including one at which I teach have gone on break. These week-long vacations from school are intended to be restorative; an opportunity for students and faculty to recharge their batteries before coming back to finish their semester strong.

Some will board planes seeking sunnier destinations and dispositions – after a winter of our collective discontent.

Rather than boarding a plane for a week, I instead drove to the beach for less than an hour.…


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Imagine

Have you ever wondered where your imagination comes from? I had given it little thought until recently while reading the book, Why We Remember.

It is a fascinating exploration on how our memory works but it also details how our memory and imagination are inextricably linked. In fact, both processes occur in the brain at the intersection of our hippocampus and default mode network.

Most of us don’t remember every detail of every experience (those few who do have something called Hyperthymesia).…


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Resistance

“Can you please slow down?” is a common refrain on road trips. Often followed by “You don’t have to drive so fast.”

Increasingly over the last few years, long drives have become sources of tension within my family. The speed with which I drive is often hotly contested.

For context, while I am most definitely driving above the legal speed limit, I am typically within the social norm of “If you’re within 10 MPH, you’re ok.”…


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Days

As the final days of 2024 wind down, it is natural to both look back to see what we have to show for them and to look forward to see what we hope to do with them in the year ahead.

We live in moments or minutes or hours. We plan our life in weeks or months. We measure our lives in years. But I believe it is the day that is the simplest and most easily grasped unit of time to consider.…


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Schoolwork

Here is a sampling of things I’ve heard from students of all ages this week:

“We had to read a book and if we felt like putting it down because it was boring, we were told that it was a sign that the class wasn’t for us.”

“I was told that my portfolio wasn’t good enough so I shouldn’t apply to art school.”

“We were told that every student was going to fail this test.”…


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Zero-sum

You may have heard a lot lately about the concept of zero-sum thinking. At a very basic level, it is the idea that in order for one person (or group of people) to benefit someone else has to lose. It is a psychological concept that we all have probably felt at one time or another in our lives.

But when it comes to opportunity is it true?…


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Decent

A few weeks ago I attended the funeral for my Uncle Dave. He was by every count a decent man, exemplified by the service itself. It began with his fellow volunteer firemen providing a testament to his forty-seven years of service, later multiple moving letters were read from each of his children and grandchildren. The homily offered by the priest spoke of a man he knew well and was clearly so fond of.…


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Misuse

When we think of the word misuse, we are likely to link it to things like power, money, and time. At different times in my life I have misused all the above. But what else to do we misuse to our detriment?

Last week, I was listening to a conversation between Marc Maron and the singer Jewel.  She was discussing her lifelong struggles with mental health and in particular how much she worried about being good enough or belonging.…


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College

This time of the year represents the anxiety ridden period when “would be” college students anxiously await their college acceptance letters. Understandably this can be a particularly stressful time for students and parents alike.

But should it be?

The reality is that the overwhelming majority of students who apply to college will get accepted. In fact the average college acceptance rate is 70%. Over half of U.S.…


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Downtime

What do you do during that time in between?  Those few minutes spent in between projects or meetings? Right before a call starts or you’re ready to work on checking that next box on your to do list? How do you fill the space while waiting for that next thing to start?

Recently I realized that my use of downtime was both consistent and unfulfilling. My standard practices would be some combination of checking my email or text messages, catching up on the latest news, and most frequently visiting a sports website to catch up on the latest hot takes and opinions of rabid Boston rapid sports like myself.…


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Produce

Happy New Year.

Before we jump into 2024, many of us might spend some time reflecting back upon 2023. Among the many questions we ask ourselves are those related to accomplishments; What did we do? What do we have to show for the year? What did we produce?

As I look back, I feel incredibly fortunate to have worked with or been supported by so many talented, wonderful people and organizations that have allowed me to produce more than a handful of things that I can take pride in.…


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Giving

As the saying goes, this is the season for giving. Yet for some, including myself, the giving is often focussed on just a few days.

For the rest of the month of December, we’re running around frantically trying to wrap things up – not just the presents we’ve purchased but various end-of-year projects – both work and personal – that have piled up the previous months.…


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Pull-up

Years ago I dropped one of my AirPods onto a train track. After the train passed, I stupidly jumped down to fetch it, not realizing how far down the track was relative to the platform. To get back to the platform, I had to pull myself up. It quickly became apparent that I could not do it. Fortunately two people on the platform were able to give me a hand before an ensuing train came along.…


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Delay

This week has been marked by delays. Delays by their very nature can be maddening and disheartening – particularly when we feel as if we have no control over them and the action that is being delayed is timely.

I took the first notification “Your flight is delayed” in stride as it was only 25 minutes and a modest flight delay is predictable. By the seventh “Your flight is delayed email” we had entered the land of the surreal.…


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Silence

There are many forms and reasons for silence.  Here are three for your consideration:

The first is silence that we allow ourselves.  In the chaos of daily life and content at our fingertips to fill a million lifetimes, increasingly we seem to leave less time to just sit in silence. When we quiet our own minds we give ourselves the gift of self-awareness and openness. The word inspiration comes from a latin term meaning “breath into.” …


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Living

I had been wanting to see the movie, Living, for some time. But with busy schedules and sold out shows, I had struck out on several previous attempts to see this small film that was in limited release.

Finally, last week I noticed that it was playing in a town thirty minutes away. So I went by myself to sit in a dark theater on a sunny Sunday afternoon to watch a movie about a man who was coming to the end of his life, and wondering if he had ever really lived at all.…


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Background

A boy tags along with his stepbrother to a casting session.

To his surprise, he is selected to do background work as an extra on a children’s show.

An assistant director sees something in the boy and begins giving him acting books as he’s never acted before. Later he offers tips on how to stand out from the crowd.

Eventually the boy becomes a regular on other children’s shows, gets a few small movies, is cast in a small but memorable part of a Quentin Tarantino movie, does some theater in Los Angeles before begin chosen to act opposite Denzel Washington in a Broadway production of The Iceman Cometh.…


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Courage

I recently visited the National Civil Rights Museum in Memphis. Its design is as remarkable as it is powerful. It is built within the Lorraine Motel. Your journey begins and ends with the site of Dr. King’s assassination, first looking up from the outside at the balcony on which he was tragically killed by the assassin’s bullet and ending by looking inside the rooms where he spent his last moments joking around playfully with his friends.…


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Generations

Leopoldstadt is the new and presumably last play written by Tom Stoppard. It tells the story of two families and spans four generations. While it explores themes of class, culture and religion, its primary question centers around the obligation family has to its members. Not just present but future and perhaps most importantly past.

Early in the play, the matriarch is showing the family photo album to her grandchildren.…


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Awe

As I write this, I am looking out at the Palisades – the magnificent vertical walls on the other side of the Hudson. If I look to my left I can see the New York City skyline off in the distance.

Upon seeing both for the first time, I was filled with immense awe. While their familiarity can lessen this sensation, it only takes a few moments of reflection to revive it.…


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Cheer

It was a week for celebration in my home.

Our oldest daughter turned 15.
Our youngest received two call backs for the 5th grade play.
Our middle daughter won her first wrestling match.
My wife won her first competitive tennis doubles match.
And my podcast won two golds – one for best interview show and another for most inspirational podcast.

When my daughter won her wrestling match, her coach picked her up in the air as teammates cheered her on.…


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Care

There is a running joke in the hilarious and poignant one-man show, Old Man and the Pool by Mike Birbiglia.

His family uses the salutation “Take care” as a parting proxy for “I love you” – which apparently they never say to one another. It is suggested, understandably, that these two words are an insufficient substitute for the three words that are the gold standard in expressing how we feel for another person.…


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Seeing

What do you see when you look in the mirror? Does it match the way you feel on the inside?

When you are out in the world, how do others see you? Do they make judgements on who you are or what you’re capable of?

Similarly, how do you see others? Unconsciously do you judge them for how they look rather than imagining “who they are?”…


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Negotiation

It was Thanksgiving Day. My daughter wanted apple pie and asked her mother to get it for her. My brother-in-law noted that he had read some parenting advice from Esther Wojcicki that suggested children should be encouraged to do whatever they can for themselves.

As Wojcicki had raised two CEOs and a doctor, the joke became – future CEOs get their own pie.

For the next three hours, no one budged.…


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