Meaningful

A few weeks ago, I was watching TV with my youngest daughter. A commercial came on for St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital. At the end, they asked for a recommended donation of $20 a month to support a child struggling with cancer. My daughter matter-of-factly asked me if we already support one of their patients. I told her we don’t but that we sponsor four other children through different organizations and have been sponsoring kids since before she was born.…


Pass

At lunch on Tuesday, I received an email from Ethan Hawke’s agent. They were passing on the screenplay I pitched to them.

After dinner that same night, I received an email from a literary agent. They were passing on a non-fiction book proposal I had shared.

Passing is a kinder, more gentle term for rejection. Yet it still stings all the same. The number of times someone has passed on a project, proposal, pitch, or offer I’ve shared is innumerable.


Eden

A wise friend recently reminded me of the absurdity of the Garden of Eden story. Two people are in paradise. They have a bounty of food, are surrounded by endless beauty, and perhaps most importantly, have the companionship and love of one another. And yet, it is not enough.

It is an apt metaphor for the state we often find ourselves in today. Most of us are blessed to have enough of what we need – someone who loves us, food on the table and more than enough beauty in the world to go around.…


Hoarding

While aimlessly clicking through the channels, we stumbled upon the show Hoarders: Buried Alive and found ourselves rubbernecking. Wanted to drive by faster and on to the next station but unable to peel our eyes away from this personal disaster.

In the show, extreme hoarders are literally buried in their own home. Unable to navigate from room to room, possessions buried under possessions. Infestations of material accumulation co-mingling with excrement from both pets and pests.


Connections

On my walk to our local library to write this, a stranger stopped me, noticing the logo on my t-shirt. “Penn State, I grew up and went there. You?” I confirmed I did and what ensued was a genuinely nice five minute conversation about our experiences in Happy Valley. We exchanged pleasantries and names and a connection based on an institution two hundred-fifty miles away and a time decades earlier was made.…


Bonds

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Now on to this week’s post….…


Community!

I left work early one day last week to watch our school’s girls softball team in the sectional semifinals. This was not the first nor last time I’ll leave work for youth sports. What made this different is that I didn’t have a kid playing in the game.

The community was understandably excited by the team advancing this far. I had friends with girls on the team – many of which I knew since they were knee high.…


Math

Thank you for making it this far. The mere mention of math can sometimes turn people away.

Yet math’s role in helping us understand the world is so critical. The astrophysicist, Neil deGrasse Tyson once said, “Math is the language of the universe.”

I was thinking about math in its simplest form while reading the paper this morning. As one might expect these days, there was no shortage of bad or frustrating news.…


Anticipation

The new year is here. With it might come some level of anxiety or excitement as we anticipate the 365 days before us.

If you are of my generation, the word anticipation might evoke this classic ketchup commercial.

The commercial draws its inspiration from this Carly Simon song.

Politically or personally you may have reason to anticipate the future with concern or fear. The world can be a scary place and the future is of course largely unknown.…


Spirit

It happens every year around this time. Some years it takes longer than others.

At some point amid all the chaos of shopping and trying to close up the proverbial shop before the holiday break, you feel it.

It could be inspired by a song, a card, or a quiet moment with family or a night out with friends.

In my case, I was shopping at an outdoor mall.…


Grateful?

On Thanksgiving, many shared thoughts of people, experiences or things that they are grateful for this year. It is perhaps the best thing about the holiday. The ability to pause from our busy lives, reflect on what we’re thankful for and reach out to share our gratitude with others. A practice by the way, that is best exercised every day, especially during difficult times. As Michael J.…


States

Water can freeze and become ice. Ice can melt and become water again. Water can be heated and evaporates into gas. Matter constantly changing states of being.

Our emotions can similarly transform into different states, often affected similarly by turning up or down the temperature or introducing other factors that bring tension and transformation.

At the same time, much of transformation and metamorphosis comes down to what is happening internally, a level most often invisible to the eye.…


United

During the fourth game of the World Series between two long time rivals – the Yankees and Dodgers, there was a long pause.

In unison, the players from both teams, umpires, crew and the almost 50,000 fans stood. Each held a placard with a name on it – representing the person they were standing up for who had – or is – battling cancer. It was part of a national effort from the organization Stand Up to Cancer.…


Pressure

I don’t know where it comes from and it can be overwhelming.

I wear many, many hats. With each one of them comes a certain amount of joy and responsibility.  At any given time, I feel as if I am likely failing in one capacity or another, sometimes more.

This potential failure is a threat to my ego. My sense of self as someone who is high achieving or “can do it all.”…


Rules

We follow many, bend a few, flout those that rub us the wrong way, and break those that we find unfair altogether. They come in all shapes and sizes. Some unwritten, unspoken, others codified in codes of contact or law.

To not follow or break them risks everything from our own guilt, to admonishment from our peers to loss of freedom or finances.

On the other hand the rejection of others can reap the rewards of freedom, independence, gains in time or treasure, even admiration of those who admire the rebellion.…


Stoic

I had resisted reading Meditations by Marcus Aurelius for a long time. The reasons for which aren’t entirely clear to me. Perhaps it was my perception that it would be cold, indifferent or dispassionate, like the word stoic implies.

Still other people, I know and respect, swear by it. Its sales soared as people searched for meaning during the pandemic.

Despite it being one of the best selling philosophy books of all time, it was never meant for public consumption.…


Songs

As the camera pulled back to reveal the face behind the hand that played the strings, a huge smile cut across my face. Tracy Chapman was on the Grammy Stage.  Playing a duet with Luke Combs who had covered her classic, “Fast Car”, the crowd echoed my reaction. Taylor Swift stood and sang along, others followed suit. It was a quintessential “Grammy Moment.”

Later in the same show, Joni Mitchell performed at the Grammy’s for the first time in her prodigious career.…


Overheard

Guess what I overheard yesterday?

Well actually plenty, and each time it was valuable and unexpected.

To overhear something is to hear it without the intention or knowledge of the speaker. Not to be confused with eavesdropping; to overhear something is not intentionally listening in on a conversation you shouldn’t but rather just picking up the ambient conversations around you.

My first instance was walking to school in the morning.…


Community

The community turned out en masse. The line inside and outside the funeral home snaked; people waited over two hours to pay their respects to a man who was a pillar in the community for decades. The heat and the crowd swelled as the family received friends, colleagues and admirers for six hours. After texting my daughters that we’d be longer than expected and letting them know they would need to fend for themselves for dinner, one astutely noted in her reply, “a long line is a good thing.” 


Silence

There are many forms and reasons for silence.  Here are three for your consideration:

The first is silence that we allow ourselves.  In the chaos of daily life and content at our fingertips to fill a million lifetimes, increasingly we seem to leave less time to just sit in silence. When we quiet our own minds we give ourselves the gift of self-awareness and openness. The word inspiration comes from a latin term meaning “breath into.” …


Strangers

You’ve probably never heard of Hody Childress. He was a stranger to me as well until I recently read of his passing and his incredible legacy of anonymous kindness.

Thirteen years ago, Hody asked his pharmacist a simple question, “Do you ever have anyone come in who can’t afford their medication?”  The pharmacist replied, “All the time.”  Hody responded by pulling out a folded hundred dollar bill  and telling the pharmacist that the next time that happens, “Use this.”…


Relationships

Try this simple exercise. On a piece of paper write down the five most important people in your life. It should be a list of people who you truly care about and enjoy spending time with. The only rule is to not include anyone you currently live with.

Now try to estimate how much time you’ve spent with each person over the last year. It should primarily be time spent in person, but if you care to include meaningful phone conversations that’s up to you.…


Sharing

This is the fifty-second newsletter I’ve shared this year. The other fifty-one can be found here

In addition, I’ve shared eight PBS podcast episodes, two NPR special programs, including Seeing Erin Hagerty – which may be the best thing I’ve made in a while

I’ve shared four published articles, including this one for Parents about how to talk to your kids about class

I’ve shared with my publisher drafts of my next two children’s books.…


Negotiation

It was Thanksgiving Day. My daughter wanted apple pie and asked her mother to get it for her. My brother-in-law noted that he had read some parenting advice from Esther Wojcicki that suggested children should be encouraged to do whatever they can for themselves.

As Wojcicki had raised two CEOs and a doctor, the joke became – future CEOs get their own pie.

For the next three hours, no one budged.…


Connecting

I have always considered myself a luddite – slow to adopt new technology, warning against its potential downside. Yet here I sit, typing on my MacBook Pro, Apple Watch strapped to my wrist as my iPhone plays music through a bluetooth SONOS speaker. All after another evening ended with my ass firmly planted in my couch watching mindless television wirelessly projected onto my wall.

Lamenting our use of technology is not particularly helpful.…